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I have not seen all of the Movies and I doubt I ever will, but after watching this Disaster all the way through I am once again reminded that the golden age of parodies is long gone. Disaster Movie is not a parody, a satire or a roast, not even remotely close to these. Referring to it as situational comedy or something that goes after cheap laughs, would not be correct either. Disaster Movie is simply an insult to the human mind. Even though there are a couple of moments where I chuckled a bit, thanks to the drug induced Enchanted Princess and The Chipmunks with rabies. The film in it's entirety is unfortunately not even close to being bearable. Contrary to what it tries to achieve, I was overwhelmed by shame and loathing. The viewers standards for being entertained would have to be at the very bottom to enjoy this. Call it low-brow, retarded or tasteless, it can only be enjoyed by children up to a certain age or by the mentally challenged. Though showing this to your child would be a crime against nature.
As the title suggests, the objects of ridicule are the numerous disaster movies that have come out in the past few years. Unfortunately, instead of focusing on this one group of films, addressing it's cliches and whatnot, it makes fun of almost everything. From movies to TV shows, to popular figures such as Amy Winehouse, Flava-Flav, Dr. Phil, Miley Cyrus, Justin Timberlake, Jessica Simpson and of course Michael Jackson. TV shows include American Gladiator, My Super Sweet 16, Girls Gone Wild, Sex and the City and WWE Divas. Hell, where's NASCAR and American Idol ? Ex-TRL host Vanessa Minnillo plays the love interest of the main character, coupled with the aforementioned and you have yourself a real piece of shit made for the MTV generation. Unfortunately, Disaster Movie was distributed worldwide for the big screen, instead of going straight to YouTube where it belongs.
I suppose addressing the storyline would be a waste of time, but it should be said that there isn't one. It's just one random moment following another, nothing cohesive or logical. It does have to make some sense, so the core of the plot is copied entirely from Cloverfield. A party at an apartment, all hell breaks loose, main character has to go find the girl and rescue her. The main problem here is that it doesn't even try, which is why it's an insult. This thing was put together with the least amount of effort possible, in hope to make a quick buck. To my knowledge, it hasn't earned back it's 25 million dollar budget and that's great, even though it shouldn't have gotten a single cent in the first place. Films like Disaster Movie need to flop, but they do have a target audience, so as long as they get even or make a small profit, this will keep on happening. In the end it's up to the audience, whether this shit keeps getting greenlit or not. Projects like these shouldn't get past the first draft of a script. Why would anyone write this stuff to begin with ? Because they are counting on the audience being dumb or simply not caring. Opening weekend gross in USA ? $6,945,535!
What I don't understand is that people rate absurd comedies like You Don't Mess with the Zohan, for example, with a 1/10, not realizing that things can be a lot lot worse. A sense of humor is of course subjective to an extent, but Zohan at least fills it's quota of laughs. On the other hand I'm pretty sure many "normal" people will find Disaster Movie amusing in some demented kind of way. Compared to Zohan, this one doesn't meet a quota of any kind. The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence. So if you haven't seen a movie worse than Zohan, that doesn't mean there isn't one. To close this puppy up, everyone affiliated with this project should crawl under a rock and die of shame. Anyone who has seen this once and for some reason feels compelled to buy the DVD, I hope you wake up some day from your deep deep slumber. Disaster Movie is at the bad end of exported American cinema, something that shouldn't pass any borders, instead be kept a national secret. I wouldn't even recommend watching this while being baked, because it would only be a wasted trip. Another example of political correctness, it's got tits, dwarfs, celebrity look-alike's - you name it. Perfect for the docile media brainwashed retards of our time. Anyone who were subject to ridicule in this film and feel hurt or embarrassed after watching it, must have an incredibly low self-esteem. After seeing this you start to appreciate some of the Wayans's recent flicks (like Little Man) a little more than you normally would. I'd rate it a 1/10, but I'm pretty sure someone has put together something even worse than this. It would be quite a feat though.
2/10
